Now the relative or abstract nature of time is something that has taxed bigger, brighter sharper minds than either mine or Chico's. I can never remember why E = mc2 but I am sure that if something approaching Chico time ever really existed, it was sometime in December 2005.

The problem for those who come in the lower places in TV talent shows is that the contracts tend to stop them releasing records. Well, releasing records until well after their brief flirtation with fame is a distant plasma screen folk memory. So poor old Chico, who may have had a chance to steal the Christmas number one from under the nose of Shayne Ward, has been forced to wait until the end of winter before getting his chance.

For those of you unaware of this song it sounds like Ricky Martin dancing the Funky Chicken in a local nightclub. We have horn blasts, slinky latin rhythms and Chico's joyful vocals. The hook is built around the idea that; "You can get delirious, if you take life too serious," which is basically Forrest Gump getting down with Abba. This will be filling dancefloors at wedding discos and 18th birthday parties for a few weeks, but I feel that for poor old Chico, after this, his time is up.

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