If they want to conform to any kind of cliche, then they're going the right way about it with this ballad, You Stood Up. All the trademark 'boyband' material is in here: the tender falsettos, lovelorn lyrics ("you never wanted me"), excruciating metaphors ("you thought three moves ahead") and take-in-turn singing - not that their voices sound any different from each other.

It's the kind of slow-dance song that would fit well at the end of a school disco, but haven't we over-saturated the market enough with all this crassly sentimental gumph? Upon reflection the name V could easily stand for Vile, Vapid and Vomitworthy. But for the sake of the music industry's credibility, let's hope it's Vamoose.