Dylan Kilby

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Dylan Kilby is your typical everyman. He wakes up in the morning and spends an hour or four volunteering as a laboratory technician at the physical therapy clinic before going to class as a pre-medical student, studying physics and organic chemistry. He then, like any average Joe, goes to work at a tutoring center, educating dozens of the students in every subject from algebra to the GRE, later kicking back by spinning an album or two as a metal DJ, or perhaps interviewing a shining local band. After a good day’s work he comes home and knocks back a microbrew as he writes in-depth reviews on both his beer and one or seven albums. He then shoots pool with a few of his buddies before seeing his stunning girlfriend goodnight. Wait. Not everyone does that? Of course, as his astoundingly beautiful girlfriend, I could point out a few minor flaws. Namely, he listens to way too much metal. Way too much. Especially the 60.7 hours of black metal. Also, his hair is too perfect. Disgusting.