And that’s a bit of an issue. Because it should. It should be parent scaring, electronic noise-terrorism in neon-pink leggings which makes small children go weak at the knees, medium sized children foam at the mouth, and large children run around hitting themselves on the head claiming that they’re the Earl of Camden.
But it isn’t. Which makes it a bit surprising, and also makes the title a fairly apt summation of the whole sorry thing – and not in the way the presumably meant. Because while We Are Rockstars is a fair old stab at approximating the clunking sound of a Daft Punk record left to rust in an East End lock-up, and Let’s Make Out takes violent nonsensical repetition to childishly enjoyable levels, in vaguely punky, Death From Above 1979 like way, the rest of the record is punctuated with such inoffensive, bland carrion, that you’re left a bit perplexed.
Because clearly Dawn Of The Dead would clearly love to be sunning itself on a yacht manned (or womanned) by a crew of supermodels clad in bikinis constructed from dental floss, safe in the knowledge the record company will pick up the tab, but with the small issue of having sold approximately no records has to make do with a horrible pout and a electronic snare punctuating each chorus with a tinny hand-clap. And Being Bad Feels Pretty Good obviously has designs on being The Killers’ All These Things I’ve Done – only played through a really shitty tape deck.
So while you could (and can) understand them longing to be The Klaxons or Justice or A.N. Other, de-facto electro-punk-dance act, but Duran Duran? The Human League? That’s more difficult to work out. And indeed, listen to.
Maybe it isn’t that we have no idea what we’re letting ourselves in for, more that our hosts have no idea what they’re doing. It’s an album that can’t decide what it wants to be and so simply fails to do either with any kind of style, falling between stools with all the grace of Shane MacGowan on buy-one-Guinness-get-three-free night at the Dog and Duck.
They asked, so we’ll tell. Does it offend me? No. Does it bore me? Yes.